The parson was at the church to check on phone messages and the mail. That was the sole purpose of the visit. No work was planned. No acts of ministry were on the agenda. It was a necessity visit.
The phone was checked, requiring six deletes and one phone number and name written on a card and placed in his pocket. Now the only challenge would be to remember where he put the note before the shirt was placed in the wash. The mail was scanned. There were two invitations to enroll the youth of his church in the Jumping For Jesus While Preparing For the End Time Celebration for Spirit-Filled Teens convocation at a recreational resort. Two announcements of community events and one notification that the retired clergy were having a gathering in June that would be a delight. The parson filed all the mail in the same basket.
Mission accomplished, the parson headed headed through the fellowship hall to exit the church via the back door. He was almost at the door when the voice echoed about the room.
“Parson, I’m glad I caught you. I saw your car and came in to look for you.”
The parson turned to greet Mildred Hosteller, one of the folks who joined the church right after Francis Asbury purchased his third horse.
“Hello, Mildred, how are you?”
“I”d like to say I’m fine, but I’m not.” Mildred made an exaggerated sniff of the air. “Can you smell that?”
The parson made an equally exaggerated sniff. Her comment was a tipoff of what was to follow.
“Let’s see,” said the parson. He sniffed again, “I can detect a faint odor of Pine-Sol along with just tinge of Monday’s Soup Supper.” The parson sniffed again. “And I can ... I’m not sure what that is.” He leaned toward Mildred and sniffed again. “That’s a lovely perfume, Mildred.”
“Oh, aren’t you cute, Parson, just real cute. You know exactly what I smell.”
“I smell animals. Animals were in this church, Parson. Saturday there were animals in this church. I saw them. I was driving by a couple of times and every time I did there were people taking animals in and out of the church.”
“You’re right, Mildred. There were animals coming in and out of the church all day Saturday. In fact, there were 167 animals that came in and out of the church.”
“We don’t allow animals in the church.”
“We don’t? Who’s “we”?”
Mildred huffed a bit. “You know who “we” is. The church. We don’t let animals in the church. Why were there animals in the church?”
“Mildred,” said the parson, “if you came to church a little more often you’d know why there were animals in the church last Saturday. We hosted a clinic where kids whose family cannot afford it to have shots and a vet exam for their pets. The vets examined and inoculated 167 animals. It was wonderful.”
“We don’t allow animals in the church, Parson.”
“Do you have a copy of that written policy, Mildred?”
“No, I don’t.”
“Then we do allow animals in the church.”
“Well, I’m not coming to church when there are animals here.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yes, okay. Are you leaving now or do you want to lock the door when you’re ready to?”
“I’m leaving now.”
Mildred walked out the door and headed toward her car. The parson whistled and his faithful canine companion bounded across the yard, past Mildred’s car and leaped through the open rear door and onto the back seat. The parson waved good-by to Mildred.
I love the description...one of the folks who joined the church right after Francis Asbury purchased his third horse. hahaha. you made my day!
and the pet clinic idea, awesome idea!
Posted by: Linda | April 01, 2009 at 03:25 PM