The assembled representatives of the Administrative Council were
sitting about the tables in the fellowship hall. The meeting had
begun.
The chairperson followed the agenda precisely and the meeting galloped along. It galloped along until the discussion turned to making some changes to the sanctuary in order to utilize a multi-media approach to the worship on occasion. The suggestion was that doing so might attract people to the church and help break out of the stagnation it has experienced for decades.
“Well, let me get this straight,” said Priscilla Pompus, “if you have that video screen in there we’ll have to move the picture of Jesus?”
“We won’t have to move it,” said Ira Rush, “but the screen will probably block the view of the picture.”
“I’m not sure about that, then,” she replied. “That picture is really meaningful for a lot of us. Edward Snyder’s mother gave that picture to the church when it first started.”
“Gracious, Priscilla,” intoned Arthur Greene, “no one said a word about taking it down.”
“I just don’t know,” responded Priscilla.
The discussion continued. Henry Gleeson asked how big the screen would be. When the dimensions were given Henry shifted in his chair and pulled his torso closer to the table. “Seems to me,” he said, “if screen is that big won’t you have to hang it where the lighted cross is now.”
“We will,” John Riley replied, “that’s the whole point of what we’re saying, Henry. If things are going to change for the church then we’re going to have to change.”
The discussion continued for several minutes. The more progressive crowd began to wear away the resistance and when the vote was taken the move to change was unanimous.
“I’m glad we’re doing this,” Rhonda Reedy said. “It’s going to be nice to get new people to come to the church.”
“Well, the trick of it will be to keep them coming,” said Harvey Hemphill.
“That is a problem,” Rhonda agreed. “You know we keep getting these nice young couples coming for a while and then they leave. I mean as bad as we want new folks to be a part of our fellowship, they just don’t seem to stay long.”
The chairperson, turned toward the parson. “Parson, you’ve been awfully silent tonight. Why do you think folks don’t stay with us very long?”
“Because you really don’t want them here,” the parson said.
“What!!??” came from several voices around the table. “Don’t want them. Of course, we do, Parson,” said Rhonda. “That’s ridiculous.”
“You don’t want them Rhonda. There’s not a person at this table that wants them here. The parson was the one who now leaned toward the table. “There’s a young couple in their thirties who sit on the back pew with their little child almost every Sunday. They sit behind David and Nelda.” The parson pointed to David and Nelda. “They’ve been coming for a little over a year. How many of you know the couple I’m talking about?” All the hands went up around the table. “Okay, so everyone knows who they are. At least, that’s what you say. Now let me ask you this: How many people at this table, the leaders of this church, the people who say you want new people to be a part of this fellowship can tell me their name? How many of you know the baby’s name? Raise your hand.”
There was silence around the table. No hand was raised.
“You folks need to realize,” the parson said, “the most important thing you can ever say to a visitor to this church is, ‘What’s your name?’ There’s a difference in wanting to know who they are and wanting them to attend with their wallet.”
It was a long, long silent moment before the chairperson thanked everyone from coming and adjourned with prayer.
I think the most poisonous words ever spoken at a church meeting are, "I just don't know." On more than one occasion I've seen a majority vote on a new ministry go south because of one person folding their arms, shaking their head, and slowly repeating that mantra over and over.
Posted by: Kurt | January 16, 2009 at 09:41 AM
I have been a member of a church for 23 years. 2 years ago, because of hurt feelings, I quit going. Not one person, ever asked me why or called to say they missed me. Not the Pastor or the youth pastor any member or friend. No one.
I thought my feelings were hurt two years ago...yah.
Posted by: Linda | January 17, 2009 at 09:43 PM
Well said.
Posted by: BruceA | January 23, 2009 at 01:10 AM