Questing Parson

A Farmville Church Sermon

Roses Are Red
Violets are Blue
Oh, My Goodness,
I'm Angry With You

Matthew 5: 21-37

Many years ago, when I was pastor in another place Valentine’s Day fell on Sunday. We decided to have a “Renewal of the Wedding Vows” service at an evening service. In an effort to generate some participation in the event, during the morning announcements I looked out at a particular couple who appeared to me, having only been their pastor a few months, to be deeply in love. So I asked them to stand and then asked the man to ask his wife to marry him again. He looked at me for a moment. He then looked over at her. And then he said in a clear and audible voice to me, “Hell, no!”

Sometimes there are dynamics in relationships of which the pastor is unaware. Anger tinged that man’s response to me that morning. Anger at his wife, and perhaps anger at the naïve man who’d been appointed his pastor who made it possible for him to express his dissatisfaction in such a public setting.

Have you ever noticed how much anger is a part of our living. I’m amazed at the things I can generate anger over. I’m mad at my postal carrier. I bought this fancy mail box that locks. It has a slot for the postal person to drop the mail in. But my postal carrier apparently doesn’t like my USPS approved box. Instead of placing it in the box so that it will drop all the way in he puts it in long way up so the tip is outside the flap, exposed to the elements.

I’m mad at the General Board of Pensions of the United Methodist Church. Instead of sending me a letter that began “We want to express our sympathy for the lost of your spouse,” they sent me a letter saying, “We have learned that you have experienced one of the following life events: a) a marriage, b) a divorce, c) a birth, d) a death. Please change your beneficiary designation form immediately.

I could go on and on. Some of you have heard rumors your pastor, at least in the past, has been known to demonstrate a temper. Did you know people have been known to get angry over the fact that someone else got angry with a third person and leave the church. Yes, that really happens, sometimes. Strange are the things over which we express anger.

Jesus said, “You have heard it was said to people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.” Powerful words; scary words for people as are we, who are so prone to be angry with our neighbors.

But let me inject a note here. Jesus got angry; it was an emotion that he clearly experienced. He drove the money changers out of the temple. He denounced some religious authorities in anger. It is a real and a human emotion. It is part of our being, and yet, Jesus says, “Anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.”

My good friend, Dr. Gary DeMore, pastor of Saint John’s United Methodist in Augusta, in his sermon this morning, confesses the things that make him angry. He relates his newspaper boy  let the paper get soggy and he got angry, He gets angry and repeats something about someone which he does not know is true.

The telephone rings at suppertime and it’s a telemarketer; he gets angry. He shares these kinds of anger provoking events with his people and then he asks the question, “What’s going on in your heart?”

What’s going on in your heart, my friend? What’s going on when you get angry? And tell me this, why is it we can get so angry over such trivial things like our neighbor’s overflowing trash can or our spouses inattention and never get angry over starving and homeless people, the exploitation of women, the trafficking of children? What’s going on in our hearts?

Remember a couple of Sundays ago when we first started reading this portion of Matthew, of Jesus’ pronouncements on the Mount of Beatitudes. Remember how we noted he was not speaking to the crowds, how Jesus called his disciples up to the mount to talk with them, not the crowds. So, if you will, try to picture that scene.

Jesus is sitting here, or standing here, and his disciples are gathered about. Now if you’re one of those Bible experts you can name those disciples. Any experts? Okay, I’ll point out a few for you. There’s Peter, and James, and John, and Matthew, and Luke, and … and … oh, yes. There’s also Simon the Zealot.

Simon the Zealot. The Zealots were a Jewish sect that hated the Romans and all they stood for. They lived under a vow to kill any Roman and any Roman sympathizer they came into contact with. They always carried a knife to be able to fulfill their vow.

So here’s Matthew sitting and listening to Jesus. And here’s Simon listening to Jesus and staring at Matthew. And Jesus said, “Anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.”

Matthew sitting here. Simon the Zealot sitting there. Anyone who is angry with a brother or sister.  Wow.

You know Jesus must have kept an eye on Simon the Zealot. He knew his disciples were not cream puffs. But he invited them into his inner circle, anyway. Don’t you know Jesus knew Simon had that knife concealed under his robe? And yet he invited him into his inner circle anyway. He invited him to be the recipient of his unconditional love.

I think the reason we are so probe to anger is we’ve not really lived under the shadow of that unconditional love. It’s not something we find along the way. It’s something we are called to. But here’s the pain and the joy of it: You get to decide if you’ll live in anger. You get to decide if you answer the call.

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Addressing Domestic Violence

Information released by the General Board of Church and Society of The United Methodist Church:

NEW YORK CITY — United Methodist Women is a contributor to a one-hour interfaith documentary, “I Believe You: Faiths’ Response to Intimate Partner Violence.” The documentary will air on ABC-affiliated stations beginning Jan. 9, and will be available for airing through March 6.

“I Believe You: Faiths’ Response to Intimate Partner Violence” gives voice to survivors’ stories, makes clear the assistance faith groups can provide, and offers encouragement and direction for women trapped in abusive relationships.

The documentary was produced with the support of The New York Board of Rabbis, United Methodist Women, Presbyterian Women, the Evangelical Church in America, Odyssey Networks, the National Council of Churches (NCC) and a consortium of Muslim organizations. The program, which features the music of Janis Ian, airs as part of the Interfaith Broadcasting Commission’s Visions & Values series.

The documentary’s goal is to report on how faith groups are exploring ways to support, advocate for and help the healing of those who harmed by abuse. Its coverage ranges from rural programs such as the Susanna Wesley Family Learning Center in Missouri to urban programs such as First Step in Michigan, from prevention programs such as Healthy Relationships held at Camp Herzl in Wisconsin, to recognition programs like the Mikveh Attendants program in New Jersey, from support groups at Emma’s Place in Minnesota to healing programs at Mayyim Hayyim in Massachusetts.

Appearing in the program are Harriett Olson, head of the Women’s Division (UMW) of the General Board of Global Ministries, and the Rev. Barbara Certa-Werner, executive director, Harbor House Crisis Shelters, a Health & Welfare Ministry of the Wisconsin Conference, and other ecumenical and interfaith clergy and educators.

Others featured in the program include:

The Rev. Ann Tiemeyer, program director, NCC Women's Ministry;

Antonia Clemente, co-founder and executive director, Trinity Healing Center;

Rabbi Mark Dratch, founder, JSAFE;

The Rev. Dr. Marie Fortune, founder FaithTrust Institute;

Rabbi Diana Gerson, executive director of Dayenu, Enough Silence!;

Imam Khalid Latif, executive director, The Islamic Center, New York University, and chaplain, N.Y. Police Dept.;

Robina Niaz , founder and executive director, The Turning Point — Services for Muslim Women & Families;

Dr. Nancy Nason-Clark, founder, The Rave Project (Religion & Violence E-Learning Project);

The Rev. Diane Smalley, survivor and former co-moderator, Presbyterians Against Domestic Violence; and

The Rev. Traci West, author, Wounds of the Spirit: Black Women, Violence & Racism.”

The documentary is made possible in part by the support of Odyssey Networks, United Methodist Women, The New York Board of Rabbis, National Council of Churches USA, Presbyterian Women, and ELCA-Justice for Women.

Dr. Debra Gonsher Vinik, head of Diva Communications, is producer of the program.

United Methodist Women has a link on its Web page with more information you can link to at I Believe You.

Check the Interfaith Broadcasting Web page for a complete listing of stations carrying the program. View the opening clip.
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Editor’s note: United Methodist Women (UMW) and United Methodist Men (UMM) have endorsed the message of the National Declaration by Religious & Spiritual Leaders to Address Violence Against Women. The Council of Bishops of The United Methodist Church signed this in 2006.

UMW and UMM have partnered to launch a domestic violence initiative to raise awareness and provide training in congregations. More information about their awareness campaign is available at Domestic Violence.

UMW urges you to contact your local ABC affiliate and encourage it to air the “I Believe You” documentary often and during prime time viewing hours. When you speak to the program director or assistant, mention the series title, “Vision & Values,” and the program title, “I Believe You.”

UMW has also set up a Web page related to the program. The page includes resources on domestic violence and study questions to help local congregations engage on the issue. The Web page is at I Believe You.

The Web page also gives you an opportunity to take a few minutes to fill out an online Domestic Violence Survey.

The General Board of Church & Society (GBCS) has developed a resource to help use film and video for advocacy purposes: Building the Movement through Film. The document is part of GBCS's Domestic Violence Web site that includes news, resource tools and a comprehensive compilation of United Methodist official policies on this subject.

Letter To A Sanctimonious Idiot

Bryan Fischer
Columnist
and
Director of Issue Analysis for Government and Public Policy
American Family Association

Dear Mr. Fischer:

I normally reserve this space for stories that revolve around the life of the Questing Parson, a retired pastor who still serves a small little church out in the country. They are stories, I hope, that keep things on a positive side and provide a chuckle here and there. I don't often express opinions outside the persona of “The Parson.” But in your case I have decided to make an exception.

I make the exception because you, sir, are … hmmm, how shall I put it? You are an idiot. Now my Mama would be a bit upset that I just called you an idiot. She would have told me I had to respect you because you're an ordained minister. But my Mama never had to put up with the damnable swill that spews from your mind.

How dare you question the correctness of awarding the Medal of Honor to United States Army Staff Sgt. Salvatore Guinta. While, in your column “The feminization of the Medal of Honor”, you acknowledge that Sgt. Guinta “took a bullet in his protective vest as he pulled one soldier to safety, and then rescued the sergeant who was walking point and had been taken captive by two Taliban whom Sgt. Guinta shot to free his comrade-in-arms,” you then say, “We have feminized the Medal of Honor.”

Here's where I get my assessment of your mental capacity” You point out that the Medal of Honor has been given in the latest conflicts for saving lives and for not killing people. And then you show your ass by stating: “When are we going to start awarding the Medal of Honor once again for soldiers who kill people and break things so our families can sleep safely at night?”

Let me get this straight. Taking enemy fire while dragging your fellow soldier to safety, chasing down two enemy thugs who are attempting to drag another soldier into captivity and then rescuing that soldier and dragging him back to safety all the while hearing the rounds whip around your space and knowing that at any minute your brains may be splattered all over the landscape is “feminine”?

I've read your biography, Reverend Fischer. You never served in the military did you? You've never known fear so penetrating your innards shake and your bowels contract, have you? You've never come face to face with the certainty of your immediate demise, have you? You've only pontificated from the safety of your closeted comfort and railed down judgment on anyone who does not share your disconnected view.

We have feminized the Medal of Honor by giving it to people who save lives rather than killing? Are you nuts? Have you read any of the scriptures on the right hand side of Malachi? There's a great story there about this fellow from Nazareth who taught that “Greater love has no one than to lay down one's life for another.” And that's what Sgt. Guinta practiced that day.

So go take a hike, you sanctimonious ____ (Well, there's a word I wanted to put there, but the memory of Mama washing my mouth out with soap prohibited it.) We both know if you were there that day with the smell of gun powder all around you, to say nothing of the smell of blood, to say nothing of the smell of fear, the panic, the confusion, the sound and the feel of projectiles flying all about you, would have placed you in such a panic that you would not have even attempted to match the feats of heroism for which Staff Sgt. Salvatore Guinta received the highest honor this nation can bestow. And praise God that he got that Medal for saving lives.

I fear you would just have stood there and pissed your pants.

And by the way, a lot of the members of my family have spilled blood on foreign soil in an attempt to save lives, including yours. So while Mama might have been mad about that sentence above, I'm also quite sure if she heard what you said and how you, by diminishing Sgt. Guinta's self-sacrificing exploits, diminished our loved ones who served, she would have slapped you silly.

I remain, one angry Parson,

The Reverend Guy Kent
Elder
The United Methodist Church
and
The Questing Parson

Whose Anger?

The parson was discovered in that coffee establishment known to everyone by a member of a church located near his. Most days did not find the parson in Star Bucks. The parson's limit for a cup of coffee was $1.17. But today he'd made an exception in order to meet with the social worker of his church's transitional ministry. Her limit on a cup of coffee was somewhere beyond $3.

After the social worker departed the parson remained to complete some notes on his notebook and enter some meetings into his calendar. It was in the course of doing these tasks Eleanor Maddox found him in the surroundings so strange to him.

After purchasing a coffee she approached the parson and sat down at his invitation.

“Can I ask you a question, Parson?” she inquired.

“Sure,” said the parson.

“Do you think some of the small churches out in our part of the community should merge to form one stronger church?”

The parson closed his notebook, sipped what was left of his coffee, and sat back in his chair as he studied Eleanor. This was going to be an interesting conversation. “Yes,” he said, “I do.”

“Then why haven't you said anything about it?”

“Frankly, Eleanor, I didn't think anyone was ready to hear it.”

“Well, Frank Jeffery is ready.”

“He is?”

“He is. In fact he came over to our house the other night and said our church should merge with the folks that broke away from us a while back.”

“What was your reaction?”

“I told him I always wanted to do what was best for the church, but I also told him I'm still a little angry over those people pulling out of our congregation.”

Now the parson was really intrigued. “Help me out here, Eleanor. Let me tell you how I've understood the history of this. Correct me where I'm wrong.”

“Okay.”

“Okay, as I have understood it there once was just an open air tabernacle and a very small stone chapel. Now, lightning struck the tabernacle and it burned down. The chapel was really too small to accommodate a full church service, so it was necessary to either rebuild the tabernacle or build a bigger chapel or church. Am I right so far?”

“Yes, that's it.”

“And then some of the people decided that if a new church was going to be built then consideration should be given to moving the congregation to the main highway to allow a better chance for growth. But they were voted down. And after the vote they left the church and built the church that's now on the highway, a church that's two miles from your congregation.”

“That's what happened. You've got the story straight. So you can see why I'd feel some anger toward those people for pulling our of our church?”

“Actually, Eleanor, I can't.”

Eleanor had begun to take a sip of coffee, but she stopped her arm in mid-motion. “You can't? I don't understand.”

“Eleanor,” said the parson. “That fire and disagreement happened in 1941. I'm sorry for you to find this out, Eleanor, but I know how old you are. That means you were two-years-old when that happened. How could a two-year-old get angry about that? You couldn't, but your mother told you the story over and over. Right?”

She looked at the parson a second, took a swallow of her coffee, looked at her watch, and said, “Oh, my goodness, look what time it is. I really have to be going, Parson. But I'll tell you this; that forming a second church is something that's hard to get over.”

The parson watched her go. He packed his computer up and headed out. At his car he saw Eleanor sitting in her car at the traffic light about a block up. He thought to himself, “There's nothing more cumbersome than carrying the anger of a previous generation.”